Finding Gateway and Kimberly Marooney was a significant goalpost for a little girl who initially imagined becoming a nurse was her highest possible and best goal. It is said we have the “best” life laid out by spirit and by joining the PhD program and graduating I can finally say, I have climbed my personal golden staircase and have exceeded all my self-expectations. And yet, it truly feels like it is now just the beginning as I don an entirely new set of dreams! Since my graduation in my home with my grandson, children, and partner witnessing I have steadily reached new pinnacles of self-esteem, self-worth, and confidence that allow me to check the boxes for unimaginable goals. I thought the PhD was for others to “get me” or have them respect my Voice Work and open doors but now I realize it was for me to own and love the true me and bring my gifts out from a deep place of security and knowing I have never felt. Let’s begin with my childhood, where our dreams are created.
Growing up with a mother who attended Stanford graduate school allowed me to see the difference an education makes. She always knew what complicated words meant and could make a fireman’s budget stretch to feed eight growing siblings. But the thought of a PhD for any family member, a Doctorate, seemed like “what other people do.” My father, an orphan, often ridiculed the educated elite and provided resistance to my mother’s devoted Catholic, and also a new-age orientation I learned in later years, spirituality, and inner guidance. Understandably, as the 6th of 8 children, I always felt over-looked and invisible and my spiritual nature and sensitivity made me feel somehow out of the circle of the inner life of my family.
With a focus on security and self-sustainability, I put myself through Nursing School and chose to marry an orthodontist for added security and social standing. I dove into this life fully. I chose a master's program in Public Administration as I always wanted to figure out who was in charge, who made the decisions, and why. I had no idea of my future role as a leader in the Divine Feminine community, preparing to take leadership positions organically as the masculine systems failed. My plan was working to not address my confusion over my differences. All of this seemed smart until our third child brought us into another world of out-of-control situations within our socially perfected crafted reality. I came to understand the darkness she carried, an entity, was a creation to bring me to my senses. To remind me that I am an inter-dimensional being who was creatively playing it safe and staying asleep. To save my daughter meant poking at the underlying energetic flows and taking a deep dive into intentional consciousness and creational reality theories. I learned that if I CALL in the LIGHT, all things show themselves to me and I have a natural command using universal principles of vibration. At that time, the fabric of my marriage could not hold the new growth and I began my true path of understanding spiritual energy and how to master it. Yet, operating as a Vibrational Educator in the world needs a little more credibility to get books published and have more opportunities to speak. So that thought was in my mind while recognizing most educational programs cannot honor the new quantum energy and sound field I was mastering helping women release fear from their voices.
The turning point came when I heard about a graduate program with a Spiritual Approach, an energy approach to manifesting a higher degree intrigued me. I met with Kimberly on Zoom and an inner decision was made. Yes, this program was right and would not slice and dice me like a traditional dissertation experience. From the moment we began I was encouraged to use my own words and not to hold back. I was so tired of holding back as I was then in my late sixties. Only being myself in small circles of like-minded women was not my destiny. I had seen many women with PhDs break through into the mainstream with new age ideas as somehow it gave a mark of credibility, a stamp of approval. To be the leader I was born to be, and now felt and could see, I needed to take this step. Yet I had nagging feelings about the expense and whether I was up to it intellectually. I had made note of people with doctorates who I felt were not as smart as I thought they should be, that gave me hope! When I joined the Gateway group Zooms I was warmly welcomed by accomplished, delightfully unique women who also were not perfect. That was my turning point. I could be me, imperfect, and be smart enough and forge ahead with my major gift of helping women release fear from their voices so they could lead. I said my goal over and over again, and it began to have a form, a potential within me that it was real, important, and could be the basis of a real dissertation.
True to form, I dove in. But spirit had other ideas. My health was declining slowly and when I was unable to sit up for a Zoom or drive I faced the possibility of slowing down or not reaching my goal. I laid down for meetings as the dizziness and numbness of my extremities increased. I felt sad I had to slow down my mentor sessions and wondered if I could finish. To those who are thinking of joining the program, know you will be tested, distracted, and try to give up. Do not give up. Stay with the process.
Finding out that mold toxicity was weakening me was another goal post-turning point. I decided to go on “walkabouts” to drier climates and thought visiting communities helping women find their voices would be a two-fold win. The “Queens Caravan Spiritual Walkabout Tour” was birthed and I was gaining health and excitement for my work and my life as I sensed I was IN my life finally doing exactly what I was born to do. Feeling better, I resumed my sessions with Kimberly and found myself thinking of myself differently. Even finally feeling brave enough to tell people I was in a PhD program I didn’t feel like a fraud anymore. My sense was people would be thinking, why at her age? Why is she spending her money on this? What is the point of her new age made-up process? And yet, the purpose and the process within me became a very strong force and carried me through the extensive, tedious work of editing, writing, and managing it all entailed. I found writing the theoretical sections came forth so naturally. For years I had studied and taught all aspects of my field. My proposal based on my own observations scientifically and spiritually forming the Voice Release process was very accountable, predictable, and powerful. I now see that Kimberly was the wind in my sails constantly reminding me to believe in myself even when I didn’t. There is a huge leap for the Ph.D. candidate from when they begin and are actually IN the processing of the critical thinking and analysis that constructs some new inner foundational confidence of “now I can do anything.” I am proud I exceeded my self-expectations. I manifested an adorable gypsy red wagon for the Queens Tours and the dream expanded delightfully for myself and the larger community I was catalyzing and visiting.
Yes, I often say “I did a dissertation so now anything is easy after that.” And that belief has now become a part of my foundational sense of self. I can do anything I choose to do. The “others” the bright ones, the uber-successful ones, I now see I can be part of their club or any club I choose. Or not!
I am IN, not outside looking in any longer. I am fit for life, good enough, smart enough. And from that comes a picture of having climbed the golden staircase of my life with an unimaginable payoff at age 69 to create anything I wish.
The other special part of Gateway is that spirit is respected and we are encouraged to listen to and follow spirit. So, if I feel I have mastered the manifestation game for life through attaining the Ph.D. and also listen to what is the next best thing to create….I am equipped for full success to dream up and deliver what is needed here next. And that brings me into full alignment with my contract with Source, to show up doing what I love to do, what I am good at and want to expand. How can it get any better than this?
Now less than six months post-graduation I have more clients than ever, greater collaborative relationships with successful women, and am asked to often to speak on podcasts, webinars, and at symposiums. I launched my Gorgeous, powerful, yet not perfect “Be the Light Divine Alchemy Card” deck on Amazon. The PhD has changed my vibration to one that meets the world confidently and powerfully. No more hiding or accepting being invisible. I brought an important energy tool to the world. I feel the right to sit on councils, facilitate new initiatives, and move forward as my perceptions have shifted to seeing myself as a person with wisdom and power. I am “still me” yet I see myself as I used to see the “others’ as the ones with the power. I still am a bit shocked when I am referred to as Dr. Jorgensen but on some level, my inner being is smiling and accepting, and acknowledging that what I had hoped I could do, I now have done.
Looking forward, the golden spiral staircase lengthens and the Queens Caravan is planning Tour Five and will have a supportive Non-profit to make it all accessible, inclusive, and monetized. The Universe shall support the Tour with grace and ease. Serving a higher goal of creating a Sound, Light, and Color Chamber for experiences of ascension is on the list for full proper manifestation this year after two decades of makeshift sound rooms. Another box to check, and one of my long-know planetary assignments. I am asking and intending daily to meet with and co-create with my divine teammates to make these, and other initiatives alive and serve. I convene with other Divine Feminine Leaders and today was asked to consider helping form the Women’s Global Wisdom Council. This is the year I go to the Middle East and help the women find their Voices with my Voice Release process. After all, it is proven, real, and credible….it has a Gateway University PhD in Spiritual Psychology with an emphasis in Spiritual Leadership behind it. I have the blue bound binder with gold lettering to say it and prove it. And that’s a mighty thing. A soul, me, delivering on the dreams I was meant to deliver to this lifetime through his body’s journey. Gateway is truly the Gateway to realizing dreams you haven’t even begun to imagine. At this juncture, I feel comfortable enough with myself to let go of my story and begin a new inner-directed more expansive “beingness” free of external influences. I can create beyond the consensus reality realm and bring visions and ideations of a higher spirit-informed nature into being with like-minded souls. As for any earth checklists that had meaning for me, been there, done that! This and more are ahead for your journey when you say yes and take the steps to get a Ph.D. at Gateway.
Jan Jorgensen RN, CMP, PHN, P.h.D, Reverend
Soundandlighthealingarts.com
